Smear Campaign

Narcassists don't enter into conversations.

They do not let their children shine

Not a Normal Parent

THE TRUTH ABOUT DR. DALE FREEBERG

•  

• He meets the criteria for Sociopathy
• He spent a week in jail rather than pay child support for his adopted son and daughter.
• He has never supported (financially or emotionally) or nurtured any of his children.
• None of his children were raised by him or have lived with him for any length of time while they were growing up.
• While he fathered and or adopted his children, that’s where he believes the responsibility ended because he no longer wanted ties with the mother of his children.
• He’s been married six times, almost seven. Several times to women named Betty.
• He’s never helped financially (or offered to) help any one of his kids for college. Even though his parents paid his way through college and medical school.
• He cannot spell or write properly and probably shouldn’t have made it through medical school.
• Believes he has “put in his time” trying to be the best parent he can be (really confused as to when this was).
• Believes that he can be disrespectful, unkind and completely ignore boundaries in all his relationships (especially family) all while believing the fault in the relationship not working lies with the other person.
• He claims all of his relationships failed because of the other person (you do the math on that one).
• He is incapable of taking responsibility for his bad behavior or the damage he’s caused.
• He doesn’t know how to say “I’m sorry”.
• He is never wrong.
• He has a HUGE ego.
• Never addressed his only sons sexual abuse.
• He never shed a tear or was upset when his baby sister went missing.She’s been missing for 19 years and he’s not ever bothered to follow up with the police.
• He has three children who take turns playing the role of scapegoat or golden child to him. Whoever will play his game by his rules can be the golden child, until the wind blows in another direction..
• He likes to pretend his own children don’t exist or are evil people.
• He can only have one as the golden child at a time.  The rest are disowned through no fault of their own, as his mood swings and the self created drama allows.
• Once said ” children should be put in harms way” when talking about his grandchildren.
• He trumped up charges, had his ex wife arrested and beat up in front of her children.
• He is a pathological liar and twists the truth to fit whatever scenario makes him out to be the good guy.
• Fancies himself to be a “scientist” when, in reality, he’s incapable of intelligent debate or communication

SOCIOPATH AS PARENT

 

1. He will love bomb his own children, and then suddenly discard them as well. The extra bonus for a psychopathic-parent is that he can repeat this for a very long time and the child has no way of going NC, if the child gets as far as understanding what is going on then hard work has been done (mostly by the caring parent sometimes with the help of a good therapist).
   
   They have a power-over relationship with the child.
   In other words whereas in a normal relationship people influence each other, with a psychopathic-parent he exercises his power over his children and feels entitled to this – plus the psychopath has ‘a legal right’ to this, the law does not distinguish between types of relationships.
   
   
   They do not love their children, but will demand love in return.
   And even when the children do adore their psychopathic-dad it will still not be enough, it never is. It will not be enough to appease him, not enough to trust the children and not enough to be there for them. On the other hand, any lack of complete adoration from the children will give him the ‘right’ to retaliate against you.
   
   They will use their children at will to prove themselves to a new partner.
   But sadly this also means that after totally discarding his own children and treating them as strangers, the psychopath will then be able to ‘prove’ to his new partner what an evil person you are and put the OW in a triangle with you that you never wanted. You get her anger (as do the children at times) and he gets her devotion and overflowing pity. Very rarely (not, in my experience) does he actually show himself to be proud of his children even though he sees himself as the best ever dad.
   
   

1. They know their own tricks and how to play them on the kids.
   In other words if he love-bombed you, he can do it to your children, and then suddenly discard them as well. The extra bonus for a psychopathic-parent is that he can repeat this for a very long time and the child has no way of going NC, if the child gets as far as understanding what is going on then hard work has been done (mostly by the caring parent sometimes with the help of a good therapist).
   
   They have a power-over relationship with the child.
   In other words whereas in a normal relationship people influence each other, with a psychopathic-parent he exercises his power over his children and feels entitled to this – plus the psychopath has ‘a legal right’ to this, the law does not distinguish between types of relationships.
   
   
   They do not love their children, but will demand love in return.
   And even when the children do adore their psychopathic-dad it will still not be enough, it never is. It will not be enough to appease him, not enough to trust the children and not enough to be there for them. On the other hand, any lack of complete adoration from the children will give him the ‘right’ to retaliate against you.
   
   They will use their children at will to prove themselves to a new partner.
   But sadly this also means that after totally discarding his own children and treating them as strangers, the psychopath will then be able to ‘prove’ to his new partner what an evil person you are and put the OW in a triangle with you that you never wanted. You get her anger (as do the children at times) and he gets her devotion and overflowing pity. Very rarely (not, in my experience) does he actually show himself to be proud of his children even though he sees himself as the best ever dad.
   

PROFILE OF A SOCIOPATH

•  
  
  
• Glibness and Superficial Charm
• Manipulative and Conning
  They never recognize the rights of others and see their self-serving behaviors as permissible. They appear to be charming, yet are covertly hostile and domineering, seeing their victim as merely an instrument to be used. They may dominate and humiliate their victims.
• Grandiose Sense of Self
  Feels entitled to certain things as “their right.”
• Pathological Lying
  Has no problem lying coolly and easily and it is almost impossible for them to be truthful on a consistent basis. Can create, and get caught up in, a complex belief about their own powers and abilities. Extremely convincing and even able to pass lie detector tests.
• Lack of Remorse, Shame or Guilt
  A deep seated rage, which is split off and repressed, is at their core. Does not see others around them as people, but only as targets and opportunities. Instead of friends, they have victims and accomplices who end up as victims. The end always justifies the means and they let nothing stand in their way.
• Shallow Emotions
  When they show what seems to be warmth, joy, love and compassion it is more feigned than experienced and serves an ulterior motive. Outraged by insignificant matters, yet remaining unmoved and cold by what would upset a normal person. Since they are not genuine, neither are their promises.
• Incapacity for Love
• Need for Stimulation
  Living on the edge. Verbal outbursts and physical punishments are normal. Promiscuity and gambling are common.
• Callousness/Lack of Empathy
  Unable to empathize with the pain of their victims, having only contempt for others’ feelings of distress and readily taking advantage of them.
• Poor Behavioral Controls/Impulsive Nature
  Rage and abuse, alternating with small expressions of love and approval produce an addictive cycle for abuser and abused, as well as creating hopelessness in the victim. Believe they are all-powerful, all-knowing, entitled to every wish, no sense of personal boundaries, no concern for their impact on others.
• Early Behavior Problems/Juvenile Delinquency
  Usually has a history of behavioral and academic difficulties, yet “gets by” by conning others. Problems in making and keeping friends; aberrant behaviors such as cruelty to people or animals, stealing, etc.
• Irresponsibility/Unreliability
  Not concerned about wrecking others’ lives and dreams. Oblivious or indifferent to the devastation they cause. Does not accept blame themselves, but blames others, even for acts they obviously committed.
• Promiscuous Sexual Behavior/Infidelity
  Promiscuity, child sexual abuse, rape and sexual acting out of all sorts.
• Lack of Realistic Life Plan/Parasitic Lifestyle
  Tends to move around a lot or makes all encompassing promises for the future, poor work ethic but exploits others effectively.
• Criminal or Entrepreneurial Versatility
  Changes their image as needed to avoid prosecution. Changes life story readily.

---

Other Related Qualities:

1. Contemptuous of those who seek to understand them
2. Does not perceive that anything is wrong with them
3. Authoritarian
4. Secretive
5. Paranoid
6. Only rarely in difficulty with the law, but seeks out situations where their tyrannical behavior will be tolerated, condoned, or admired
7. Conventional appearance
8. Goal of enslavement of their victim(s)
9. Exercises despotic control over every aspect of the victim’s life
10. Has an emotional need to justify their crimes and therefore needs their victim’s affirmation (respect, gratitude and love)
11. Ultimate goal is the creation of a willing victim
12. Incapable of real human attachment to another
13. Unable to feel remorse or guilt
14. Extreme narcissism and grandiose
15. May state readily that their goal is to rule the world

(The above traits are based on the psychopathy checklists of H. Cleckley and R. Hare.)

---

NOTE: In the 1830’s this disorder was called “moral insanity.” By 1900 it was changed to “psychopathic personality.” More recently it has been termed “antisocial personality disorder” in the DSM-III and DSM-IV. Some critics have complained that, in the attempt to rely only on ‘objective’ criteria, the DSM has broadened the concept to include too many individuals. The APD category includes people who commit illegal, immoral or self-serving acts for a variety of reasons and are not necessarily psychopaths.

http://www.mcafee.cc/Bin/sb.html